RAYCE - Whatever's After EP

Posted by Ernesto Orwell on

Whatever's After encapsulates my life from mid 2015 to early 2017. The title comes from believing New Version of Old Soul was the last album I would put out before fading to black musically. The delay? I gave my life to Christ a few years ago and felt the content would create a blurred image of what my present and future are grounded in. I also got married since this project and did not want it to sound like I was cheating on my wife or addressing behaviors I still act on. Without listening to the project in its entirety, the concept could easily be lost as glorifying my past actions and beliefs. WAKE - speaking as if it were my literal wake, written as a suicide note. I address having survived a blackout rollover in 2015 and my struggles with mental health before and after. WOES - explaining my past outlook on women. I slept around, cheated and wanted gratification without the depth of a relationship. The clip at the end is real audio from my ex, during a night of candy flipping (MDMA and LSD) when I recorded video of the moment with the intention of using whatever would come of it; she had no clue. I use to take pride in Luciferianism, hence her calling me "the devil" which I often related to as a sense of identity. URBAN LEGENDS - the concept and title stem from conversations at the time of creation. Healthy relationships and the idea of coping with life without abusing substances or committing suicide seemed like an urban legend to me. The first verse addresses my past failed relationship and the deception that kept us apart while together. The second verse references a night I overdosed on ecstasy while I was supposed to stay sober with the woman that would later become my wife; I continued to sabotage the good even after making it out of the hell from my past. The third verse addresses the absolute depravity of the life I was living. I sold my soul for a life I thought would provide the peace I could not find. BLOWING IN THE WIND - a letter to my wife during the time we began dating and through the frustrations of getting to know each other; written in 4 parts. There was supposed to be a melodic chorus but the artist flaked. Rather than butchering it myself or having someone else do it, I left the silence which seemed suitable to the biggest struggle that I have in our relationship. SAY GRACE - the last song written! More directly focused on Luciferianism and a few of the problems I had with believing that I could find the answer in searching for God. Infinite was one of the first Christians I met that made "secular rap" while still maintaining a faith. I knew that when I gave my life to Christ and as I searched for someone to feature with, I wanted it to be him; thank you James, sincerely. DAYS GONE BY - the first song written. Very much a synopsis of what the entire project was about: life was passing me by without having a grasp on reality or an understanding of what I should do with my music. Ariano was instrumental. He believed in me and wanted to help; for that I am grateful and apologize for not releasing this sooner even though that was always my intention to have it out after we recorded and mixed it all down years ago. LIFE SENTENCES - a friend committed suicide the same way I had fantasized about ending my life; to lose him was surreal and felt like I was watching unfold what would have happened if I had taken my own life. Another friend shared her scars with me and allowed me to put it into writing. The bridge and last verse tie in how I still struggle and how the pain of it all feels like a life sentence. If you read all this, we share a heart, mind and soul for why this project is now public. Please email me. There is more to be discussed. -Raymond

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